Helping my beautiful mother as she transitioned from this realm to the next was excruciating and powerful in ways that will probably take my lifetime and beyond to fully comprehend. It still sits with me every minute of every day. I miss her shine and spirit and love and humor and cozy, warming, healing hugs, and the way she viewed the world as colors, and translated that beauty onto her canvases.
I've done an extensive amount of healing work that ranges from EMDR to Shamanistic exorcisms. I've processed my experience on many a therapist's couch. I've tapped my meridians through the entire ordeal countless times. I've released my stored sadness on every massage, Reiki, and acupuncture table that I've come into contact with. I've screamed. I've thrown ice at rocks. I've self-medicated. There have even been many, many times I've wanted to die just to be with her. I've surrendered to it. And I've prayed and prayed for relief. So I feel confident that I've been nothing but proactive in doing things to move and release some of the pain.
But ultimately I keep coming back to the notion that I will never fully be free of grief's clutches. Yes, it may sting a tiny bit less each year. But I will never be grief-less. And to be honest, my grief intensified immensely throughout my entire Lyme healing journey over the last few years. I desperately needed her care and love.
In person. With me. Not above me, or around me. And not her sending messages in the form of hawks and hummingbirds.
So I've found myself turning more and more to flower essences.
These two specific formulas have been quite helpful as of late. The Trauma Repair assists to clear, stabilize and soothe. It can be used to help heal and resolve painful memories from the past that may be interfering with present life. It is a powerful and cleansing blend that may catalyze deep healing. I use it in combination with the Rose Flower Essence Tincture. This highly nutritive flower and an age old symbol of heart holds special nourishment for body, mind and spirit. Floracopia's "multidimensional Rose tincture, based entirely on flowers, has several main areas of action within the body-mind complex. First, it helps comfort and heal the emotional heart. Second, it calms the mind. Third, through its hydrating and cooling action it nourishes the body's Yin (what keeps us fluid and supple) and promotes a healthy inflammatory response. Forth, by way of it's purifying and nutritive qualities it supports digestive function, intestinal health and skin radiance."